Let's overturn these tables

Last post I summarised some useful information on how churches and christians can be more aware of traumas that some people suffer. This post I summarise information on how churches can not only be aware of trauma, but better minister to those who have suffered trauma.

Please note: I am not a counsellor or a psychologist. No-one should act on the basis of this post alone. Rather, this post is summarising what experts say and points you to sites that can help you to a better understanding.

---

We have learnt ….

In my previous post, we learn these facts about trauma:

• Psychological trauma can result from experiences that leave a person feeling overwhelmed and isolated. Some traumatised people may be attending church.
• Experiences at church (e.g. physical or sexual abuse, bullying or manipulation by leaders, fear of hell and judgment, exclusion) can be traumatising.
• Church leaders have a responsibility to avoid church trauma occurring and creating a safe place for those who have experienced trauma.

How churches can help

This is some of the advice I have gleaned from the sources listed below.

Be aware

It would be helpful if leaders in all ministries read up or received training on how trauma occurs, and its impacts.

• Trauma can be caused by serious accidents, witnessing violence, bereavement, sexual assault, natural disasters, being diagnosed with a life-threatening illness and repeated or continuous events such as emotional abuse or childhood neglect. Churches can be places where trauma can be caused.
• Understand the widespread impacts of trauma. Trauma can have physical, emotional, cognitive, behavioral, relational, and spiritual impacts. Those experiencing trauma may not feel safe and may come to church alert and vigilant – something might trigger a strong physical or emotional reaction.
• Recognise signs and symptoms of trauma. These can include behaviours such as social withdrawal, being more emotionally reactive, and feelings such as low self esteem, emotional instability and difficulty trusting others.

Be safe

We want churches to be safe places. Importantly, they must feel safe to people who have experienced trauma. In particular, we need to avoid practices that may re-traumatise. This requires safe procedures and sensitive relationships.

Safe procedures

• Provide explicit information on behavioural standards, especially for leaders.
• Have clear and clearly stated procedures for dealing with felt problems. Examples include having female leaders available for women to go to if feeling unsafe, and safety for children procedures.
• Make clear that people who are feeling uncomfortable at any time should feel free to leave – and make it easy for them to find and use the exit.
• “A church should present itself as a place of hope and healing and not a place where rules and rituals are the main priority.”

Sensitive relationships

• Respect people’s boundaries, don’t push them..
• Be patient with those suffering trauma. Recovery can take time, and rushing people with statements about how they “should” be responding, o telling them to “just get over it” are unlikely to be helful.
• Be sensitive to trauma triggers. Try to use trauma informed language that avoids stigmatising people and naming them as victims.
• Build trust. Leaders must be consistent, authentic, and accountable. Church members can be alerted to the need to be sensitive and grace-filled, to be kind and treat people with dignity, not condescension.
• Don’t equate the experience of trauma with lack of faith or obedience. Trauma doesn’t indicate weakness or God’s punishment. Secular counselling isn’t wrong.

Be supportive

• Allow people to tell their story if they want. If they do, be calm, listen, take interest, ask appropriate questions but say little.
• Healing happens best in community. Reassure people: “You matter. Your input matters. Your presence matters.”
• In some cases it may be possible to establish support groups with people who have come through similar experiences. It helps for people to know they’re not alone.
• Empower people to make their own decisions, with support where necessary, but without direction and being pushy. This allows people to develop confidence in themselves again. (This is generally good for most situations of christian disicipleship.)
• Be positive. With God, hope and healing are possible.

Understand

Trauma can arise because of aspects of our culture. Discrimination against women, LGBTQI people, racial minorities, the poor and the disabled, can cause significant trauma. Churches can be particular sources of this discrimination.

It is important that christians understand these factors and examine whether their church is causing trauma in these ways. And understand as much as possible if and how these factors have been a cause of trauma in an individual’s life.

If we are aware of all the above, and more, then we are more able to understand, empathise and be sensitive to people’s needs and sensitivities.

It can happen in your church

I have personally known situations where people have been traumatised by excessive zeal or control by church leaders, inability or unwillingness to care about those traumatised (or maybe failure to recognise), and insensitve treatment of people whose beliefs or values don’t align with the congregation’s teachings.

It can be difficult balancing truth and discipleship with love and tolerance, but being aware of the possibility of church trauma should be one of the factors leaders keep in mind.

References

• 5 Ways To Be A Trauma-Informed Church. Keith Condie, The Mental Health and Pastoral Care Institute.
• Six Core Trauma-Informed Ministry Principles and What Is a Trauma-Informed Church? How the 4 Rs Clarify Our Ministry Aim. Hope’s Companion.
• How Can Churches Help Trauma Victims Heal? F. Remy Diederich.
• The Religious Trauma Collective.
• Signs of Emotional Trauma in Adults: 5 Behaviors That Might Signal a Need for Healing. Dr Jack Bartel, Recovery.com
• Trauma Symptoms, Australian Psychological Society.

Photo: Kaboompics.

---

You may also find these pages helpful